Confessions of a Shop-a-holic Part 1

Hi Everyone, I AM a Shop-a-holic. I say that loud and proud. With no fear of repercussions (except for the occasional "oops" in my checking account- which I try to avoid at every twist and turn of my existence).I Love to Shop. But here's the thing; "The New Normal" and "Post self Quarantine Behavior" has and is making it difficult for EVERYONE!

But Fear Not!

The Internet has your back. TV Networks have your back. Catalogs and Phone Apps have your back. You can shop from sun up to sun down (depending on the limits of your cash or credit) and you don't even have to emerge from your house or  engage with anyone. Or better yet, you can shop 'til you drop in your Pajamas and no one would know it.

Let Me Tell You About My TWO Best Favorites.

(And I say this with REVERENCE)

Hanging On

The other day, on NPR,  I heard a sad news story of a "killer whale" (such a misnomer that) - hanging onto her deceased pup. The newscaster insouciantly called it her "journey of grief" and that it had been a record breaking 17 days before she had "finally" released her dead pup. I am not quite sure what saddened me the most; - that the news caster seemed not to have compassion for another living mammal who had lost her "child", or that in that oh so sad journey the whale was labeled  a killer instead of what she was (an Orca or at the very least a very sad Marine Mammal) or that there seemed not to be any compassion for that particular marine mammal and the time it took her to "realize" that it was not going to get any better so she let go.

That Got Me to Thinking...

How long do we, as humans, hang onto things that are no longer of use to us or that no longer serve us? How long do we hang onto relationships that are not going to get any better? How long are we going to hang onto our fears, hang-ups and let downs and let them affect our power to make decisions or choices, whether informed or spur of the moment? How long are we going to sit quietly by and let life "happen"? 

Making Up For Lost Time

Last week I bought a computer. This was after 4 and a half years of doing the right thing, self denial, worrying about the needs of others and being a wife and mother. And you know what I think? I should have done it YEARS ago -  When my first computer decided to die on me. I never should have denied myself this piece of electronics. I  always thought of a computer as a luxury, not a necessity. But more fool me. I found out the hard way that you REALLY DO NEED a computer at home. 

So, while I denied myself this necessity, life moved on without me. I got out of touch. I lost my files that I had paid to keep in the clouds (or so I though), favorite sites shut down  and I now have to learn the technology all over again.  

You either make things happen, Watch things happen or ask "What Happened".

Well, I am now asking "What Happened" and I am now trying to catch up and figure out what's next. 

O.K.  Wish me Luck.

Let Go

 I am sharing an article written by my business and life coach Lisa Robbin Young. You may know her as The Renaissance Mom and the owner of The Direct Sales Classroom. She originally posted this blog post quite a while ago.  I feel that the teachings here are significant for this point in the present as well as in the future. 

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 In the past 24 hours it feels as though I have awakened from a 35 year coma. I can’t begin to explain everything here, at least not yet. But new realities have come into my field of vision, and I’m seeing the world through somewhat different eyes. As moms, we

A Tribute to my Mom on the Day After My Birthday.

A funny thing happened this morning... that would not have happened ordinarily. I had the meltdown of all meltdowns this morning. And it was over something that some would call insignificant. Basically, I broke a china tea cup filled with the last cup of coffee from the coffee pot.  Yeah... under normal circumstances, it would be just another broken cup, but for me, it was another loss of my mom.

One particular Mother's Day, my Mom had given me a beautiful box of English Dessert Teas and this Beautiful China Tea Cup. ( We had long ago made a pact, that we would not go overboard on gifts... It was just one of those pacts you make because you figure you have time, to spend with each other and to  love each other). Anyway... the gift, however humble, meant something to me, because my Mom knew that in the evenings, I would like to sit with a book by the fireplace and pretend to read. I would  just silently sit and contemplate. (She would call it brooding, but I prefer to think of it as seriously thinking about whatever was on my mind.) Anyway... I have had the cup for some years (the tea is long gone) and this particular morning... I just picked up the cup to make my morning coffee. I put it on my desk, not thinking, and as I sat down by the computer, the sleeve of my robe, brushed the spoon, which in turn upset the cup and the cup went crashing down. I looked at the mess and burst into tears. In the scheme of things, it's just a broken cup, but I saw another thing that my mother gave me shattered. And I cried like a baby, which in turn woke my son up, and GOD love him, he picked up the mess and was collecting the pieces and was seriously going to try to put the cup back together.

Old Fashioned or Just Out of Fashion

The other day I went shopping with my sister, Sharon. Not a remarkeble incident; just your everyday, two sisters hanging out, type of thing. Anyway... We went into this clothing establishment and I noticed some sundresses hanging by a clothing round. One dress in particular caught my attention. I thought the print was very pretty. I thought the shape of the dress was nice. I thought the straps may have been a little flimsy. And then I decided to feel the material. I got the shock of my life. No exaggeration here! When did they decide to make sundresses out of night gown material? You know, the type of flimsy, nylon material, used for "silk-like" panties and nightgowns. Oh my goodness! What have women been excepting as clothing? Is this world so obcessed with sex that it now expects and excepts women to walk around in their underwear and nightgowns? Do women really want their clothing to shout, "jump me"?  Or... and here is the horrifying thing... Am I just Old Fashioned and Out of Fashion? 

Paladin, Spun Sugar Spoons, Twist tie Chocalate...and What does it All Mean? Why we Dream

What!? Whoa!? She's off in Left Field!

No I'm not...Just give me a chance...This article has something to teach and does have a point.

Anyway...I woke up this morning and I asked my husband "So, why do they call you Paladin?". My dream was so convoluted that I woke up with a sense of wonder as well as confusion. To make a long story short, I dreamed that I was on a trip, lost my suitcase, needed a prescription, had to check into the airport after a long ride on a Greyhound bus, needed a snack and was given plastic spoons and bread ties which turned out to be spun sugar and chocalate respectively, saw my husband being catered to by other women and being called "Mr. Paladin" and My mother was whisked through the airport to the VIP gate.

This dream led me to do a little "research" into dreaming . All of which gave me theories which could not really be proved or disproved. Terms like neoro-transmitter, mental schemes, emotional selection and dissociated imagination danced in my head. And incidentally, gave me a headache. So, is it biology or psychology?

One theorist described dreaming as simply "thinking in a different biochemical state". People continue to work on all the same problems—personal and objective—in that state. The research found that anything—math, musical composition, business dilemmas—may get solved during dreaming, but the two areas especially likely to help are 1) anything where vivid visualization contributed to the solution, whether in artistic design or invention of 3-D technological devices and 2) problems where the solution lies in "thinking outside the box"—i.e. the person is stuck because conventional wisdom on how to approach the problem is wrong.